Half the Man I Used to Be: Well, Really, Two-Thirds

Weight_Loss_Comarison(6-28-13)

Greetings Friends!  The journey continues and is going well.  Since having surgery, I have lost 137 pounds for a total loss of 176 since beginning my weight loss surgery adventure.  I am now two-thirds the man I used to be, having lost 33% of my starting weight.  I can’t even describe how good it feels when I say that.

Watching the numbers on the scale go down is something of which I will never grow tired, but lately it has been the “non-scale victories” that amuse me most.  It should come as no surprise that my clothing sizes are dropping along with my weight.  That’s just physics at work there, folks.  I’ve gone down three, almost four, shirt sizes and reduced twelve inches from my waist.  I know!  I am shocked as well!  What is really great, is that I recently went into a Meijer and bought shirts.  That may not be a big deal for those of you who are “normal” sized, but for someone who has had to shop at a Big & Tall store for the past two decades it is a HUGE DEAL. Can I get an AAAAAAA-MEN?!

There are a lot of things like that which have been changing for me lately as I get closer to the size of a “normal” person.  I can sit in boothes now at restaurants!  No longer do I fear that a table will not be available, forcing my party to wait for one and watch people come in after us get seated.  Or, God forbid, the place be one of the dreaded all-booth establishments.  This scenario is a nightmare-come-true for many of us.  We’ve all had those dreams where we are in public naked.  The all-booth restaurant feels a lot like that.  There is nothing you can do, but wait for the embarrassment to come.  This is something that may be difficult to understand for anyone who has never had to ask for a chair so they can sit at the end of the booth table blocking traffic.  Not as much fun as it sounds.

Speaking of chairs, those with arms no longer hold a dark place in my heart.  Yeah, some of them are still a bit uncomfortable, but for the most part I can sit in any chair I want again.  Talk about liberating.  I don’t even need the seat belt extender in my car any more.  I do still use it, though, but only because the buckle receiver is in such a weird position on the seat that the extender makes it easier to get to.  I mention that just in case you ever ride with me, notice that I am using the extender still and think to yourself that my pants should in fact be on fire.

The mental changes are a bit more subtle and abstract.  I never realized how much my weight affected my demeanor.  I have always been a fairly out-going person, but in the last couple of weeks, folks have remarked on how much happier and sociable I seem.  The more I thought about it, the clearer it became that I would often hold back in and even avoid social situations because I was so unhappy with my weight and how I looked.  As I’ve lost weight, now I’ve gained self-confidence.  I just feel better all around.

I would say that there is a new Marv coming out, but that really isn’t the case.  I think I am just getting back to the Marv I used to be.  Yes, I have always been a chunky butt.  It has been the last several years, however, that I ballooned up and let it get out of control.  It put me on a downward spiral into self-loathing, anxiety, and depression.  It’s a very dark path on which to be.  I shudder to think how things might have ended up without the support of my family and friends   The surgery has been an incredibly effective tool that has helped me with the physical transformation, so am I now able to climb back up that down-trending spiral.  It has been my community of supporters, however,  that has turned me around and gotten me moving back up and out of the vortex.  I can’t thank you all enough.

Stay tuned for updates and thank you for reading.

 

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3 thoughts on “Half the Man I Used to Be: Well, Really, Two-Thirds

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  1. Not enough words to express how HAPPY & PROUD I am for you!!! Keep up the work 🙂 continue to feel better and enjoy a healthy & happy life

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